Being vs. Doing in 2014

Okay, so we have already touched on the obligatory post about how to make resolutions that work.

This is vital stuff of course, if you are going to set out to make some significant changes in your life you want to go about it in such a way that you have the best chance to succeed and let's face it that's what we coaches get paid to help people do right?

But I have been thinking since I wrote it just what it is people set their resolutions about.

This was also inspired by two recent conversations; one with a very good friend a couple days ago as he shared his resolutions for 2014 and one with my daughter Rachel today, New Years Day.

My friend had many written, specific and detailed goals but they were not the typical work out more, eat better, lose weight or career goals.

All of his were personal objectives focused on who he would be and how he would live. His resolutions included:

Continue to search for meaning, be ready to recognize it when presented, and commit to experiencing it fully
Live life with passion and purpose
Continue to become the best version of myself I can be in every regard
Tell the people who I love how much they mean to me with regularity
Find the best in everyone and let them know that it is seen and appreciated.

Quite  beautiful and powerful objectives. It occurred to me however that these all related to how to be and that usually when discussing resolutions or goals the focus is on what to do, a dramatic difference. It seems that people often get caught up in task oriented goals and to do lists. Maybe it is easier to set concrete objectives like lose 15 pounds or quite smoking. However, I think we often fail to truly recognize we are more than just a list of accomplishments. That at the end of the day it matters most who we are  and how we are rather than just what we did.

The conversation with my daughter today started with her asking me what word represented my theme this year. I had to think a minute as she shared that hers was commitment. The theme of commitment being the guiding principle to  adhere to as she pursued personal and business objectives in 2014. I chose Big-Time. The principle to no longer play small and take everything to a higher level including my business but just as importantly my personal relationships even my personal care like exercise and meditation. Truth be told I played kinda small in 2013 and it is time to step it up a notch in lots of areas. I liked her idea to have an overall theme, a guiding principle or word. This approach also supported the concept of how you would be rather than just what you would do or attain.

As I considered this approach it became clear that if we set the objectives and themes around how we are being what we ought to be doing to achieve and support that would be apparent.

I believe that the more closely aligned your goals are to your deepest values the more motivation you will have to work towards them and the more fulfillment, happiness and meaning you will feel as you achieve them.

And so today I am encouraging you as you consider what changes you will make and what you would like to do with this new year that you start with who and how you want to be. As with everything else worthwhile we must have a clear vision of what we want and a step by step strategy that will get us there if we can hope to attain it.

What types of objectives reflect how and who you want to be?

 

Here are some of mine:

Fear less & risk more both personally and professionally, go all in

Live with more freedom and independence

Show more love and appreciation to people in my life more often.

Recognize and appreciate beauty in all forms.

Play more, live fully and invite others to join me.

Say thank you more and complain  less

Be in the moment, focused and present

Make a positive impact in the lives of as many people as I can everyday.