Eyes Wide Shut

I am borrowing a title from a movie I really did not like. Famous of course; Stanley Kubrick, Nicole Kidman, Tom Cruise, impressive. No debate here, I just did not get it I suppose, maybe I will watch it again.

The title is perfect though for how we often go through life. We have our eyes open but closed tightly at the same time.

Let's be honest; there are many things in our lives we choose not to see.
This is a choice, conscious or not. Once we really look at something, particularly if it is unpleasant it makes it more more difficult to ignore. We can put blinders on to those dark and difficult things about ourselves, our loved ones or in the world at large. I have seen patients act as if an obvious serious illness does not exist until it is far too late just to avoid dealing with it. I have grown up in a family filled with violence and mental illness that was never discussed, never addressed. I have witnessed people go through the motions and daily routine of unfulfilling careers or ignore painful damaging relationships rather than risk a different choice. I myself have failed to see things about myself or openly address things in my relationships many times. There are so many different levels to this; it may be an unwillingness to a see a serious life threatening problem, to challenge the hurtful habits of a loved one or a blind spot to our own negative habits but whichever is the case it undermines our ability to have a happy and fulfilling life.

It is part of a survival mechanism I suppose, it keeps us going, protects us from getting bogged down. But ultimately, like all fear it prevents us from being fully ourselves and enjoying our best lives.

When we are struggling or find we are stuck in a vicious circle, when we have a sense of despair or are suffering anxiety it may be our inner alarm clock asking us to wake up and open our eyes. I believe we know far more than we think we know. I believe we have wisdom and answers within us if only we have the courage to see and act. You undoubtedly have experienced the ah-ha moments and flashes of insight that come when you finally take something out and examine it. Particularly as you talk with a trusted friend, coach or therapist, they provide guidance, support and a safe venue for you to explore and discover what has been there all along, but only when you are ready and willing to open your eyes.

It has taken me a lifetime to begin to open my eyes and frankly I am not totally there yet. There are still things I am reluctant to see, issues I see but am reluctant to act upon but I hope to do better.
There are long held habits and mistruths to overcome. Thinking you will hurt someone, feeling you are powerless, minding your own business, not knowing you are worth it, believing this is just the way it is. Lies.

The truth is we are powerful. We can make a new choice, anything can be better or at the very least our reaction to it can be. When we stop believing that this is as goods it gets, life get's a whole lot better.
Not easy. But have you considered that living with your eyes wide shut is not easy either?
We stumble around not speaking our truth, not playing full out, not taking a stand.
Maybe you are just used to it but maybe you could get used to something more bright, crisp and clear.
As you begin to see what is real, who you are and what you really want you see all new choices before you and life becomes more bright, authentic and fulfilling.

What things are calling to you to be seen?
How might you benefit from a little more light and clarity with a situation or relationship in your life?
What are you afraid to see?
How might things improve if you took a closer look anyway, what might be possible?