Janus and Resolutions That Work

So it is that time of year again. Time to reflect on the past years trials and triumphs and look ahead creating the vision of what you want in the New Year. While there are some that are disenchanted and do not partake in this process I think for those that do it is a sign of health, optimism and success. In fact, January is the ideal time for this having been named for Janus the Roman God that has two faces; one looking forward the other back ruling over transitions and new beginnings.

As you think about the resolutions you will make, take a moment first to reflect on the past year. This enables you to clearly see areas that need growth as well as recognize the triumphs and strengths that you can build upon in the New Year. It is easy to forget all that has happened in a year, it may help to look over your planner or journal and recall month by month what defined the good moments, what was accomplished, what you learned, where you struggled or suffered.

It is out of this exercise that you will gain insight into what you want next. Which elements do you want to expand and develop? Which do you need to let go of? How can you utilize the lessons from 2012 and other past experience to support you moving forward? Take the time to acknowledge any large or small gains and feel good about what you where able to do, be and have in 2012.  This practice is the foundation of  confidently and successfully moving ahead to more growth and gains in the future.

Finally, keep in mind not all good things start out positive and most are rarely easy. Do not overlook what you have worked through, suffered or struggled with. Even in moments that may have seemed bleak you have prevailed and used strengths and skills to be proud of. If last year presented pain and tough transition look ahead to 2013 as a year to find the blessings in the burdens and the opportunity for growth and renewal these times always present.

As you define the goals and resolutions for the New Year follow some simple guidelines to ensure your success outlined below. Remember, resolution comes from the word resolute: To be purposeful, determined and unwavering. Decide what it is you most want, set your resolutions and then be resolute in pursuing them.

Keys to resolutions that work:

• Choose goals that are meaningful to you, that you truly want. No should do's or filling others expectations


• Write out your goals, place them where you can see them and review them frequently.


• Set the objective larger goal then define the baby steps and supportive habits you will implement to get there: Plan in detail.


• Understand why you want what you want. What will it do for you? What will it feel like to attain? These are the feelings you are truly after and will provide you with the motivation you need to stay on track.


• Enlist the help of a partner, friend or coach; this provides support, encouragement and accountability.


• Do not fall into the trap of giving up after a setback, that is an excuse to quit for the less committed.


• To be successful one must understand that it is in recommitting, as often as necessary that we ultimately triumph.

I wish you a happy, healthy and prosperous New Year as you create a life you love!

 

Rights Responsibility and Freedom

I have grown weary this past week in the wake of the horror of Sandy Hook of the continued assertions of gun rights. Firstly, you will not find a person more a champion of personal rights and freedom than I. I have always maintained in fact, that it is not guns that kill people but people that kill people. This remains true. However, we cannot deny that we have a tragic trend in our

current culture of mass random shootings, this requires a serious and effective response. We must also remember that the right to life liberty and the pursuit of happiness preceded the right to bear arms and remains tantamount, any right that interferes with that basic fundamental one must be reevaluated.

It is true that criminals will always have guns, they typically acquire them illegally and always will. It is important to note that nearly all of the weapons used in recent years for mass shootings have been legally obtained.

Furthermore, most agree that in the past few decades we have seen a widespread increase in rudeness and bad behavior. A decrease in patience, courtesy and tolerance. A significant lack of respect for parents, authority and meaningful values.

We like to talk a lot about our rights in this country but we seem to forget that with rights come responsibility: Responsibility balances and enables rights. To enjoy our rights and freedoms we must act responsibly and address the underlying issues that lead to a culture that has developed such a disturbing trend. That being said we have some serious questions to answer and major adjustments to make.

• Are we raising our children to be compassionate and kind with strong coping skills, tolerance and respect for others property and life?


• Are we treating people with mental illness properly and providing resources, facilities and support for them and the families caring for them.


• Are we doing all we can in the legal sale of weapons to ensure that only responsible, stable people obtain them and hold those people accountable for the safe and secure use and storage of those weapons?


• After the removal of religious teaching in schools have we replaced that with other ethical and moral instruction?


• Are we mindful of what our young people are exposed to? Most witness both real and dramatic video violence numbering in the thousands before they graduate high school. How long will we continue to deny this has an impact on their developing impressionable minds?


• Are we modeling kindness, tolerance and patience and treating others, even strangers with respect and dignity?

If we are honest we fall far short.

Parent or not we all bear responsibility for the climate of our culture and can all effect positive change starting with our own behavior. For all of us to enjoy the fundamental right of life liberty and the pursuit of happiness we must become responsible when we do we can all fully enjoy all the other rights this country provides.

There is no way to make sense of the murder and carnage at Sandy Hook. It has robbed those families of their most precious thing their children and loved ones. But it also robbed the survivors of innocence and the belief we all need that the the world is a good and safe place.

I pray that out of this we will finally wake up and use this horrendous act as an impetus to make the changes we have needed for years.

The solutions to all violence and crime in our society as well as the other issues of social decay are multifaceted and complex but begin with simple individual steps we can each take.

How can you be part of the solution?