It seems to me that everything is a play of oppositional forces in life. I suppose that is what the symbol of yin and yang is all about. Sometimes we forget that this applies to everything including ourselves and that it is a good thing.
Recognizing the duality of the nature of things and accepting it can bring us peace.
In reality there are subtle shades and multiple hues inherent in who we are and all aspects of our world but being human we so prefer stark contrast and set rules. Categorizing things and people as good or bad, dark and light helps us make sense of our world and enables us to make quick decisions that are at times necessary for our survival. However, this habit can also be our down fall as we harshly judge ourselves and others creating more separation and preventing us from the connection, experience and acceptance we truly seek.
When we consider that all things, including ourselves are a complex mixture of negative and positive elements we can chose to begin to accept all of that rather than fool ourselves into thinking only part of the package is acceptable. We have the ability to look at all parts of ourselves with compassion and can then extend that to others as well.
I think in the long run this is the purpose of our lives, to learn acceptance and compassion for the purpose of connection starting with ourselves.
Connection is what we all seek, though we may call it different things we all deeply desire feeling grounded and connected to the essence of who we are. We yearn to feel at peace with our place in the world. We want to be seen as who we really are and loved as well as see and love another. Some may have a stirring to share creatively in the world, I believe all or most of us do as yet another means to take what is within us and push it out to connect with others. Connection. It comes in many forms but that is what it is all about.
The thing that stands in the way of connection is of course our notions of rejection and separation. This goes back to the idea of dark and light, good and bad and our human history of judging ourselves and others. We have spent thousands of years building real and imaginary walls, keeping “them” out while at the same time segregating ourselves from the full richness and beauty we seek. The truth is all we reject in others exists in ourselves as well so our hate or disdain for another becomes a self recrimination even when we do not realize it. We can never feel fully loved and at peace with ourselves when we harbor hate for another because we are all part of the same whole and our soul knows this to be true even when we do not.
As I have learned to accept all of who I am, including the darkness, ignorance and shortcomings it has helped me more fully appreciate my beauty, brilliance, creativity and warmth. It has most significantly enabled me to embrace others for all that they are and to feel the sameness and connection that is there. Learning self acceptance and compassion not only heals your own soul but has the power to reconnect us to the collective soul that we unknowingly seek.
I believe that the pathway to this acceptance and connection is compassion. Recently, I have realized that the best teacher of compassion is struggle and suffering for it is in these moments when we are burned to the hottest glow all pretense and artifice turns to ash. It is in these times that barriers fall away and we can learn compassion for all others that suffer as we do and feel the sameness that exists in that pain. We like to think love brings people together and indeed it does but nothing connects us more than recognizing the familiar pain in the eyes of another. Depth of emotion teaches an open mind to feel the essence of truth that is hidden in other moments. Learning compassion for our own struggles, insecurities and doubts allows us to make room for everyone else who faces the same dark nights. It is in this that the beauty of our struggles is revealed, when we can allow our hearts to feel not only our own pain but the sorrow of others as well without turning away. With boldness and courage we can cultivate our strength and embrace our vulnerable humanity at the same time.
Compassion. To understand with the heart the reality of the soul. We are all a mixture of light and dark. None of us all bad or all good. Thankfully we are a complex mixture of all things, just as is the nature of life. Know this. Accept this. Embrace this. This truth will bring you the peace and connection you seek.
