Soild Steps for Uncertain Times

I think for all of us the current political and cultural climate is a bit unsettling right now to say the least. For many of us, myself included it goes beyond that to very disturbing. Even those who do not typically get inolved in these things are being hit with constant coverage of dramatic changes,  impassioned opinions and conflicting facts, these are uncertain times.

In my lifetime in this country there really is nothing that compares to what we have witnessed the past few days and whether you are cheering the changes or fearing the worst it is hard to know what to do. We must answer tough questios from our young people, grapple with our faith or that of others, work with or live with people on opposite sides of current issues. We may know or encounter folks being targeted and not know what to think or say about any of it.

I am extremely fortunate to have had a beautiful vacation the past week during which I did my best to avoid the news and keep my mind off what was going on in the real world choosing instead to be fully present to the beauty of nature and total stress free living.

 When I arrived home Friday things sure changed fast. I caught up on the news watching clips of the inauguration, marches, speeches and executive orders for longer than was wise I am sure. I had long discussions with my coworkers, friends and family about what was happening, what it all meant and how we felt. It really helped to have intelligent, informed and thoughtful people to sift through a lot of this, I am glad it was my weekend to work, grateful for their listening and sharing of ideas.

I must admit, I have been unhinged and deeply troubled by what is going on. It is difficult to know what to do in times like these and I can only imagine many feel the same way. I believe though that in stressful times it is critical we take steps to manage that stress so that we are at our best to manage our lives and be ready for whatever comes our way next.

Step One: Be informed ... just enough.  Choose news from varying credible sources and try to remain open minded. There is plenty of good coverage but it can be very difficult to discern what reality is when we are openly offered "alternative" facts and just about anyone can post anything and make it look legitimate. If you find yourself agitated or overly distresssed consider carefully if you are digesting too much information. There are endless stories, articles, interviews and reports vying for our attention, watch your diet.

Step Two: Care For Yourself Wherever you fall on the issues our environment is extra stressful right now. It is a good time to develop stress reducing techniques and self care routines or up the frequency of your currrent rituals. These may include whatever activities refuel you or bring you peace and joy. Meditation or prayer allows time to decompress and connect spiritually, exercise is proven to increase serotonin levels which helps us feel good emotionally. raises our heart rate to burn off extra physical tension, calories and improve cardio- vascular health all at the same time. Yoga can be a great way to find mind body synergy and deeply relax. Connect with nature, spend time with good friends or family in lighthearted conversation and laughter, read things that inspire or uplift you. Journal your thoughts as a way to release or sort out feelings. Seek a therapist or confidante if you feel the need to talk things through in a safe environment. If you do not have some of these habits now it can take some discipline to start. Chose things you actually enjoy and put them on your schedule, arrange your day so that it is easy to fit in your activity and then do not cut it out. Remind yourself that making time to care for yourself is the best way to ensure you can care for others well, be more productive and creative. Stick with it, habits typically take 30 days to synch in. Try adding some healthy happy habits for 30 days as an experiement and see how you feel.

Step Three Take Some Action: Doing something feels more powerful and proactive than doing nothing. Be involved in community groups or support causes you believe in. Make your representatives aware of how you feel on issues if you have an opinion and are so inclined.
 One of the most powerful things we can all easily do is to increase our acts of kindness and cultivate more compassion for others, especially folks we do not know. Be aware that stress can make fuses short and tempers flare, confusion and uncertainty is rampant which can lead to impulsive behavior.
Be kind. It is amazing how powerful simple acts of kindness and respect de-escalates a situation, creates instant good feelings and builds bridges between people. Being courteous, smiling, lending a hand, listening do not take a lot of time and may make someone elses day, as a bonus it will lift your mood instantly as well.
Try to imagine how someone may think or react differently than you because their life or perspectives may in fact be different from yours. We are all unique individuals and do not think the same. However, we are all the same human race and share the desire for safety, love, dignity and respect. One need not agree to offer understanding or tolerance. As Stephen Covey says,”seek first to understand then to be understood."
Empathy alows us to feel the emotions of others, it is a skill we have in varying degree or maybe not at all. If you are an empath chances are you are on sensory overload right now and really need to be vigilant with self care.
Compassion on the other hand, is the ability to recognize and have concern for the feelings and troubles of others which we can all cultivate more of in ourselves, teach to our children and model for our peers. Finding a way to make a positive impact in a manner that feels right to you no matter how big or small is empowering when things seem out of our control.

For more resources on meditation or journalling see last weeks blog post here.

http://www.lifescapestrategies.com/blog

Look Back to Propel Yourself Forward This Year

Many believe that January was named for the Roman God Janus. Janus seen here, has two faces, one looking forward the other looking back. He is the God of transitions, beginnings, endings and doorways which is apropos. January is the ideal time to look both forward and back to reflect on last years events and achievements and plan for what we want to create and experience in the coming year.

With the frenetic pace of modern living it can be tempting to just keep on keeping on rather than carve out time for deep reflection or to develop detailed plans for the future. But skipping this process robs us of vital insight and possible success.

Looking back informs us of what worked well and where we came up short. It provides a history of what has lead us to be where we currently are and an understanding of why. It also offers a chance to celebrate and be grateful for the experiences we have had, something we tend to do too little of. Human nature predisposes us to focus more heavily on the struggles, personal shortcomings and failures while discounting our achievements, positive attributes and good times.  But it is vital to plug into the positive energy we gain when we do well to boost our confidence, and to prove our abilities to our biggest doubters, ourselves. This energy fuels our ability to accomplish the next dream or goal and contributes to our sense of well being and happiness. Reflection may highlight an area that we are not in alignment with or areas of our lives that we have neglected. It can be disheartening to look back on your year as I did last week and realize that you did not achieve anything noteworthy at all. Not every year is a record breaker, I am ok with that, but it inspired me to be more diligent is setting my agenda for this year and be more dedicated to taking bold action toward my goals. We can examine the choices we made and the results they produced and see more clearly what choices we want to make next. Honest reflection is powerful and future focused since it informs and directs us on our next steps.

Once we have the data from our last experiment, for what is life if not a daring experiment, we are ready to make plans for our next foray into the future. There are diligent goal setters out there that have SMART Goals in all areas of their personal and professional lives and there are many others that have no desire to do this and prefer to go with the flow. I think having a clear idea of where you are going and the steps to take you there is key not only to achieve success but to live with more happiness and fulfillment.

Each year my women's group makes vision boards in January as a means to flesh out our hopes and dreams and focus our energies. We always marvel at the images that speak to our deepest desires that we may not have even been conscious of without this annual exercise. We pull out previous years boards and celebrate the experiences we have had as well as the power and magic of this practice.

Journaling can also be a tool to inform and direct. For many people, myself included, words are weighty and writing something down makes it somehow more real and serious. Journaling throughout the year, monthly recaps or summaries of significant achievements, circumstances and emotions can provide of wealth of information. Working things though on paper can also be therapeutic and provide release and healing.

I believe the more sensory something is the more imprinted it is on our hearts and minds. Sensory simply means to utilize the senses, seeing, hearing, touching, even incorporating aroma helps deepen experiences, anchor ideas and make memories more vivid.I also believe it is best to use everything at our disposal to increase the chances of our reaching our goals and creating the life we want. Chose multiple ways to bring your hopes and dreams to life and keep your goals clearly in front of you to inspire action and maintain motivation.

Use a few methods of reflection and direction as you look both forward and back this January. Set aside time to quiet your mind and listen to what comes to you. Meditation is a wonderful tool to open your mind to what has already occurred and your heart to it's deepest desires in addition to a myriad of other benefits. You will find links for guided meditation and information to get you started below.

Journalling can be as simple as developing a habit to pour all your thoughts randomly on paper when you feel the call, ( my method), or can be guided with prompts and structured with writing formats and schedules. A few journal prompts for January are included below.

With clarity of the end in mind we can then work work back to develop the steps that will take us there. It matters not if your goal is to become a CEO, to travel or run a marathon each requires clarity, planning and persistent action to come to fruition. A good goal setting article is also included below.

January often gets a bad rap as a time to think about the things we should do which can make us feel compelled to do things we really do not want to do. This way of thinking misses the mark entirely and serves to undermine us all. We will never be successful or fulfilled achieving another persons goal, the path to happiness and success is our own to set. I suggest that we think of January as a time to celebrate what has already happened, examining all the information regarding what went well and not so well. Then explore to discover what we truly yearn to do and could do if we just took the time to clarify what we want and had the courage to pursue it.

 Meditation

There are many forms of meditation which has grown in popularity the past few years. Try some methods and just get started all share the benefits of increasing awareness, improving creativity, lowering stress and even blood pressure and cultivating a calm and peaceful existence. Do not be discouraged, it is a practice and will evolve with you. the intent is not to empty the brain as much as itis to simply open it. Many people find it difficult not to be distracted and may do well starting with guided meditation I have included some information for you to get started.

Headspace
There is a website and a free app on your phone that walks you through what meditation is and gives you a 10 minute guided daily practice right on your phone or laptop
Perfect for beginners! 

Transcendental Meditation
A deep practice from India very well researched and documented for it's loads of health and wellbeing benefits. It is a mantra led twice daily practice that I am trained in and endorse. This is the type Oprah, Dr. Oz ,Jim Carrey and many other prominent people including the Beetles have been known to speak about. It requires a few sessions of training that costs a fee and offers lifetime assistance groups and support learn more here
https://www.tm.org

Info
Here is an article which includes 13 apps for meditation
https://flipboard.com/@flipboard/flip.it%2FRqVKBY-13-meditation-apps-that-make-doing-it-e/f-68aa29989e%2Fgreatist.comNew Year Prompts
http://journalbuddies.com/journal_prompts__journal_topics/newwritinideas

http://psychcentral.com/blog/archives/2014/09/27/30-journaling-prompts-for-self-reflection-and-self-discovery/

Reflection 

http://psychcentral.com/blog/archives/2014/09/27/30-journaling-prompts-for-self-reflection-and-self-discovery/

Goal Setting
SMART Goals
Goals that are written, clear and your own are most likely to be achieved. SMART goals refers to a method of setting goals highly proven to be effective.
read more:

https://www.mindtools.com/pages/article/smart-goals.htm